Wednesday, July 1, 2009

Billy Could Use A Robot

It's one of the more commonly known stories. The house party. We've all been to them. Many people have thrown them. And it's a drastically different situation depending on what side of the room you're on. Last week I threw a house party when my parents went away, because my parents NEVER go away, so it's reason to celebrate. My Mom can be pretty meticulous with the house, so it becomes a pretty tricky game of making sure everything is back where it should be when they return. I did the usual stuff, box up valuables, move couches, put down towels; all the essentials. I actually thought I did a damn good job, and after a pretty good cleanup the next morning, assumed I had gotten away scot free. What could my Mom POSSIBLY find?

Once again, I didn't give her enough credit.

Initially, she didn't see anything. Normally she spots stuff right away. When she didn't, I figured I was home free. Nothing was said for two days. Then the weekend hit, and when I returned home from seeing REVENGE OF THE FALLEN(facepalm) I was met with a simple question:

"So who played poker here last week?"

The reason for the question was that each other time I had a party, she spotted something and I said that I had the guys over for poker, when it actuality I had parties. My parents are never MAD, so I don't know why I freak out, but I do. Anyway, I play it pretty cool, and ask: "Why? I didn't have poker." My Mom replies: "Just....things."

Ridiculous, I think. I went crazy with this house. What did she see? I needed to ask.

"I didn't have a party, what do you see that makes you think I did?"

And that's when she tells me. There's a stain on the carpet in the kitchen, there's potato chip crumbs on the floor in the dining room, and there's a deck of cards out. How did all that happen in the one day they were gone?

I had worked too hard to let little details like this ruin me. TOO HARD. So, I opened my mouth and just hoped a reasonable excuse came out. I sputtered this:

"Yeah, uhh, had pizza, spilled sauce. Chips fell, cards were for improv." It sounded awful. But for some reason, the story was bought. In fact, my Mom seemed to feel bad for doubting me in the first place, which ya know, made me laugh, then it made me feel terrible, and then it made me laugh again.

The moral of this story is, when you're throwing a party, think twice, and then make sure you have access to technology from the end of Weird Science.

No comments:

Post a Comment