Saturday, May 16, 2009

Lizzie's Hostessing Hooplah

Hello my doves!

So it may come as a surprise to some of y'all, but while I'm not doin my thang with the HDO crew I like to moonlight as a hostess in Asbury Park! Yes yes, I am just an average working Jane like the rest of the world. Don't get me wrong, I really do like my job...but sometimes it can get a little boring. That's where my little imagination comes into play and helps me find ways of getting through the slow moments at work. Here are just a few ways you can entertain yourself in the restaurant biz:

Doodle:
Typically at hostess stands there are things you can write on with those cool pencils that wipe away. So when I have some down time, I like to write little notes, make patterns, or just draw. I tend to draw mainly hearts and stars...fuck horshoes.

Tell Jokes:
Today was knock knock joke day. Knock knock...who's there?...interrupting cow...interruptin-...MOO!!!

Prank the Servers:
Servers wear aprons...put shit in them!!! Leave love notes, ice cubes, monopoly money, etc. My goal is to put a buzzer in an apron and then page it so that it freaks out right by their crotch!!!

Teach the Staff New Words:
One hostess taught a Spanish speaking busser the word "twat". He really likes that word now.

The Elevator:
This requires an audience. Stand behind the hostess desk and then press an imaginary button and slowly sink down...classic Austin Powers style.

Well I hope that gives you guys some help in finding ways of getting through your 9 to 5's.

Until next time!
-Lizzie

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