Brushing Teeth - It's one thing to have morning breath; but it's ridiculous to have night breath.
Babysitting - "Whoops" is just a synonym for homicide.
Mother's Day - Did your Mom forget about you during the 1st trimester? NO! Well... maybe it's the reason you have a predisposition to alcoholism. Regardless, your mother is like an elephant; she never forgets. Don't forget her. I also just called your mom an elephant.
Condom - Don't be like your parents. We don't need anymore mistakes running around.
Girlfriend/Boyfriend - If you're going out, give the "significant other" a call to let them know where you are. This way they feel at ease while you slam your latest crush. "Significant other"'s don't get upset. If you liked it then you should have put a ring on it.
Homework - Sometimes you graduate and sometimes you don't. This may be my new jingle since I'm writing blog posts instead of working on my backlog of homework.
Please be done H1N1,