Ryan and DaBomb

So...rather than update my blog (like I was supposed to 2 days ago) I took a two day shower to wash the sin off of myself. This past weekend was GORGEOUS and I hope you all took advantage of it, like that time I took advantage of that...cuban....boy....my....junior....year....

...

Anyway, because it was so beautiful outside, Bar A (i know. trust me, i know) opened up their outside deck and sand pits and stuff and I double fisted so many beers. Just like that time i double fisted that....cuban....boy....my....junior year.....


Anyway....

I went out with a bunch of "co-workers" and we had a small table to ourselves. Over a short period of time, all of our beers began to overflow the table and people started getting confused as to which beer was whose. We were so confused that my dear friend Sara took a sip from one beer and said "oh my god, who put a shot in this beer?" "A shot?" we all thought to ourselves. Then, my friend Asa's jaw dropped...

About 20 minutes earlier, my drunken comrade Ryan C. began indulging in his small tin of chewing tobacco. That's right. My friend Sara drank my friend Ryan's dip spit. It was perhaps the best moment of my life. Well, except for that time I disposed of that Cuban boy's...body....in...the...woods....

Uh....


ANYWAY! My weekend was only completed on Sunday when someone called in a bomb threat at the mall. Security guards began to run around yelling "close up your stores! there's a bomb in JCPennies! Go to the food court!" I acted swiftly, but rather than head to the food court, I figured there were still some rays to be caught. So we all sat outside and watched as the cops drove around in circles. And boy am I red! I look like a human lobster. You should see my tan lines.

And you will. YOU ALL WILL!!!

Well, I had to get that off my chesty so I can get some resty. Call me!

- Ry Guy