It worries me that as time goes on I'm getting grumpier and grumpier and noticing more social flaws in people that annoy the hell out of me. I'm certainly not naive enough to think that I behave perfectly in all social situations, but there are things I see on a daily basis that just drive me crazy. I don't get why people act like this, and I don't get why more people don't say something to their face. Granted, I'm being a hypocrite by not saying something and just writing about it. But, you people know who you are. I sense this is going to be an ongoing series. Here is the first edition.
I do not get these people. Let me explain what I mean. Maybe you're face to face with someone, maybe you're on the phone, maybe you're texting, maybe you're IM'ing, maybe you're greeting a person. Regardless of the way you're communicating with someone, I feel like there are certain ways you do and do not start a conversation. Generally, you start with a greeting. The convo moves on from there. If something surprising or worth telling happens during this time that you want to share, generally what I do is start telling the story right away, because I'm already WITH the person, so why all the unnecessary hype and setup? You're not a showman. You're not a master storyteller. You're just a person, and you don't need to tell your stories like you're a TV promo.
If I'm in the middle of an instant message and you've had a strange experience, it doesn't help me if you just type: "Wow." I have no idea what you're talking about. I'm not in the room with you. I didn't experience what you just experienced. It seems like you saying "Wow." is just a segueway so I have to go......."WHAT IS IT?!?!?!? WHAT HAS CAUSED YOU TO EXCLAIM SOMETHING LIKE THAT?!?!" and then YOU say, "Oh, so glad you asked......" yada yada yada and the story is probably boring anyway.
If you call me, and instead of opening with "Hello" you say, "Well, THAT was interesting.", do you not realize that I do not know what the "that" is that you're referring to. Why can't you just tell me. If anything, you're spoiling the story because I'm expecting something crazy to happen at some point because of your setup. You've taken away the element of surprise and added an element of self-important I'VE GOT A STORRYYYY TO TELLLLLLL. It hurts.
Therefore, dear readers, if you have something to tell me, just tell me. I promise I'll be all ears. You don't have to sell me on it before hand. I have faith in you for talking about interesting things. If I didn't, I wouldn't talk to you. I don't have time for BORING people.