Friday, January 15, 2010

Ryan and the Scream 4 Opening

My dream role...

::RING RING RING RING RING::

Ryan: Hello?

Scream Guy: Hello.

Ryan:Who is this?

Scream Guy: Who is this?

Ryan: Oh my GOD! Is this Who wants to be a Mill-on-air?! D) AUSTRALIA!

Scream Guy: No! This isn't a game show. Besides, that was canceled like 7 years ago.

Ryan: Speaking of which, I think Ugly Betty might get canceled soon which is really sad because it started off so funny, ya know? My favorite character is Amanda -

Scream guy: Look, I don't give a fuck about Ugly Betty! I'm calling because I wanna play a game. You like games?

Ryan: I like catch phrase. But I don't like the Government category because I don't know anything -

Scream Guy: What's your favorite scary movie?

Ryan: Um....well, Paranormal Activity really hit home for me.

Scream: Are...are you sure it isn't something a little bit more classic? Like Halloween or Friday the 13th?

Ryan: I'm sorry, guy, I farted like 7 seconds ago and it fucking stinks in here.

Scream Guy: Who am I talking to?

Ryan: Well my name is Ryan, but since I got my haircut, I look like Jamie Lee Curtis. (sings) Activia!

Scream Guy: Well I wanna see what your insides look like, Ryan.

Ryan: God! You just reminded me - I've got a small tube of Vaseline in my murse and I wanted to take it out.

Scream Guy: Do you wanna die tonight?

Ryan: If you die, do your student loans go away? Cause if that's the case, take me home!

Scream guy: You...I don't think you're getting the point. I wanna kill you and spread your guts all over your living room.

Ryan: Well it's not like anyone would see it. I'm sure my two dogs and five cats would manage to clean it up before my mom and dad even got home. And yes I still live at home, ha ha, laugh it up.

Scream Guy: I - I think I'm gonna try another house.

Ryan: Hey, before you go, did you know Billy's mom swallows?

Scream Guy: Who the fuck is Bil-

Ryan: Later bater.

::CLICK::

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