Billy's Concert Rules

I know there are lots of people who make a living going to concerts.  They love the atmosphere and they love just losing their minds and letting loose while listening to their favorite bands.  There can be a lot of enjoyment in doing that, and I've done it myself.  However, as time goes on, I start to look at shows differently and realize what I was looking for in shows has changed.  Certain people I know strive to avoid at shows, because it seems like they're being "RIDICULOUS" for the sake of being WACKY.  They might as well be wearing shirts that say: "Please for the love of God, look at me and think I'm crazy.  That's all I want.  I want to be someone's story later."

These people are very easy to spot, and should be avoided.  Here are some rules on who to avoid and what to do and not do at shows.

• Avoid mosh pits.  I do not get the appeal here.  Ok, that's not entirely true.  Sometimes you just need to let loose and relieve some stress and crash into some people.  We all do.  But these pits seems to be getting more violent and are not enjoyable.  It's so bad that some people seemingly are forced into the position of "Security" and they stand on the outskirts, pushing people away from them and making sure the wackos don't spill over into the sane people.  I gotta believe that's not the reason those people bought tickets to a show.
• Crowd surfers.  Maybe I'm just biased because I'm a bigger guy and can't really pull it off, but this just seems incredibly risky.  Especially if you're a girl.  Or have anything in your pockets.  Or both.  *wink*
• Cellphones = New lighters.   People actually send texts during shows?  And film stuff on their cameras?  Has that footage ever sounded good, filmed in a crowded room, next to a speaker?  Morons.
• The people that "fall" into you and conveniently wind up in front of you.  We get what you're doing, and you're not clever. 
• I go to shows to sing along and have fun, not feel like I'm in a boxing match.  I didn't go to prove my toughness or how much of a badass I am.  I know I'm not and I'm comfortable with that.  And I know YOU'RE not, and you've yet to come to that realization.  No one thinks you're cool.

Except your parents. They think you're great, and they don't get why the girls have not come around to that fact yet.  But keep being tough at concerts.  It's bound to work.